guess who's back... back again.

Ahhhh it's been a hot minute since I made a post. Remember in the beginning when I said I was going to make posts twice a week? HAHA shit. But anyway, not to make excuses or anything but the last few months have been kinda junky. That's right, straight out of the junkyard, broken radiator (is that a car part??), AC busted... JUNK. So buckle up (unless that's gone too) and I'll share with you the junk in my trunk.

Cruising down highway 95 to my incredible job at the hospital, I had everything I was looking for in a job. Great coworkers, a job I thoroughly enjoyed, decent pay and definitely the opportunity to climb the ladder. *que dolly parton 9 to 5* "you're just a step on the boss mans ladder but you got dreams he'll never take away".... and I did have dreams, that no man was going to take away. That is until......... JOE BIDEN.

***TRIGGER WARNING***

if you are easily triggered by political standpoints and matters containing CORONA VIRUSSSSSS you may want to close out now. don't say I didn't warn ya...

So, I love corona. Like seriously, nothing beats an ice cold corona with LIME BABY. You didn't think I was actually talking about this dumb virus that has completely taken over the last 3 years right? Oh noooooo. But anyway, cruising down highway 95 to my job, everyday, my future ahead of me, I absolutely LOVED where I was and what I was doing. That was until, again, another man problem..... THE MANDATE!!!!!

dictionary definition of mandate: an official order or commission to do something.

tori's definition of mandate: the most idiotic, inhumane, absolutely ridiculous thing ever, yes, ever.

When word first went around of the mandate I was so optimistic, because you know me, miss freaking POSITIVITY!!! I didn't actually think that our lovely government (and selected state official "austin powers" IYKYK) were going to let people be terminated from their jobs that they worked tirelessly for. I mean, good dang workers. Over timers, butt busters, just incredibly hard workers, myself included (toot toot, my own horn). How is that even right??? Just see ya later bye, don't come back now yah hear????

Though I beamed with optimism, walking ray of frickin sunshine, it still did not change the outcome (I'll get to it hold on, not at my exit yet). I knew in my head that I was in NO WAY getting the CORONA shot, because as I said, only ice cold, with a lime. However, my heart (which is already twacked out enough) was so heavy because I was going to have to walk away from a job and coworkers that I LOVED. Yes, I loved my job. Didn't I say that already?????

Anyway, the weeks went by and I continued to work in hopes that something would change before October 31st. I did what I could to get a medical exemption, because as some know my heart is actually twacked and has issues of its own LOL. But in all seriousness, I had a great fear (and still do) of receiving the vaccine due to my underlying heart conditions.

*** because some of you might wonder, I had open heart surgery at 17 years old. my heart was enlarged, I have 3 large holes, a bad mitral valve and active leaking***

When I tried calling to get a medical exemption, I was instantly denied. Like I don't even think the receptionist asked my name as soon as I mentioned what I was calling about. Bless her heart..... but screw mine right? hahaha.

Okay, I am coming up to my exit, I'm just now veering onto the exit ramp.

I was never able to get a medical exemption (nor religious) so as of October 31st I was TERMINATED. Yup, big ole storm cloud right over this ray of sunshine. It was me and 1 other pumpkin in our office patch (halloween, get it?) that were terminated. IT SUCKED. But, I knew it was right in my head.

So that's the junk, but it's not in the trunk yet.

The last few months have been kind of a world wind. I mean I have been successful as I have started my own cleaning business, but I am still struggling with what my actual "purpose" as you will, is. I mean I know my purpose as a 5 foot, over tanned, ice coffee addicted individual is, which is just to live... but as far as a career, I have no flipping idea.

Is this what a mid life crisis is?????? I mean I don't have hot flashes or night sweats, but I think that this might actually be it. You know, at the big age of 25. I think its that drive into a quarter of a century, which apparently has hit way too many dang potholes and popped a tire (again), but yeah, I think that is what I am actively (okay I am not very active) but that is what I am going through.

TIME TO PREACH BABY

I got this, and you got this. You might not be in the exact same car as me right now, which is probably good because I wasn't joking, my tires are always flat hahahah. BUT HAVE YOU SEEN THESE DANG ROADS IN MAINE!!!! More potholes than pavement. Geesh

Fo real though, this car ride is temporary. We will get to our destination, one day. There will be bumps, flat tires, potholes... all of it. We gotta keep driving until the wheels fall off though baby, or until we run out of gas..... then we run outta money cause gas prices are.... that's another conversation for another day (lets go brandon).

Hang in there though, sit in the passenger seat with me. Let's ride this highway together and figure out which exit we are getting off. We will hit a few rest stops on the way, catch a break, then ride again. Ride sallllllly ride. Or jimmy, or karen, or patricia, whatever your name is it doesn't matter, just get in.

Here's to riding along, cause only God knows... and as Carrie says "jesus take the wheel"

This goes for anything in life. Not just your career struggles, but maybe trying to figure out who you are, where you want to be, who you want to be with, what you want to do, what you might want to stop doing, anything that causes you a sense of confusion. Just put it in drive, God will do the rest.

***Disclaimer***

If you read this far I do want you to know that I am in no way against any individual whom has received a "CORONA WITH LIME" so please don't think that. This was my choice, as it should be. K, bye!